If you're faced with a particularly tricky situation...
And a YET/BUT statement just isn't cutting it.
A way to stop yourself from entering into a spiral of negativity is to use this phrase:
"Telling myself these things is not going to help me or change my situation."
Here’s an example.
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Negative self-talk
“I wasn't selected for the squad. This sucks! I suck!
I'm not sure if I'll ever be good enough and I only have another one shot at it next year.
I don't understand what I did wrong.
It's so unfair.
Maybe I must just give up altogether?
I'm so embarrassed and I feel like I let my parents down."
Neutralized self-talk
“I wasn't selected for the squad. This sucks! I suck!
I'm not sure if I'll ever be good enough and I only have another one shot at it next year.
I don't understand what I did wrong BUT...
Telling myself these things is not going to help me or change my situation."
This may not solve the problem, but it at least stops you from doing too much damage with what you hear yourself say about the situation and yourself.